"If I could know what goes through your head when you watch me, if I could find, at least, if you think ... At least, I would sleep.
And now nothing makes sense, sometimes I look and try to smile indifferently, keep talking, like you do not notice and you lose, you look and see that you're smiling like me, as they should dead smile, I think. Why do not you understand, because everything would be as easy as come running and tell me you love me, no problems, and I will not die alone, for telling me deserved.
I would call you, hear your voice, know what you're thinking right now, know that even remember your hands off my body.
For though you see me walking, I have yours as scarring wounds all over his back, and when I see her I know, I know that pride, I will not stop, even if I die standing.
Remember when you kissed me and told me you loved me? Tell me, tell me also what you said to her, tell me you lied you lied just like me to me then.
You do not understand me, you wanted that I understand you, but you do not you stopped to wonder why I want to die, why I am still crying now. You would not ever understand me, just convinced.
I regret everything from the first second I thought you were different, since the first kiss, from the first heartbeat provoked me. I wish I had not ever seen, wish I had not discovered that you could never want more than myself.
You fool, you never understood what it means to love. Love means you and me, not us. And you never understand that, silly.
No more advice, do not want any more questions, no more I hope that you call me that I will stand in the aisle and give me a hug asking for forgiveness, I do not live thinking about what you want. I live my life, I stay low, but I want it back. "
You will not ever read this letter, you never know all the damage I've done, and I'll see now I'm crying as I'm not going to give that satisfaction, but I just want to know one thing: you were the only person I would have fought to continue in this life.
Adios. "
Marta wipes her eyes, wrinkled leaf, a ball and throws it with the others to pile their trash filled and that Saturday afternoon.
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